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What if you were king/queen of PKI for a week?


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Hey folks,

Here's one for your imagination. What would you do if Craig Ross (the GM of PKI) took a one week vacation and left YOU in charge of PKI for the week. What changes would you implement, if ANY, during your one week tenure. And be realistic......don't say you'd build a mega coaster because that takes a lot more time (and money) than one week.

Okay PKI monarchs..........please respond.

Edited by italianchef
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A nice pay raise would be nice... but that is very unlikely since the park has to keep building new rides and attractions and the employees have to suffer with very low pay!

Of course, if I could have Mr. Ross's pay for a week I would very happy! I would imagin him having a pretty big salary, probably in the 6 figures range...

* I don't work at the park for the money though, I work there b/c I LOVE the park and I LOVE my job! I can get more money working at McDonald's than the park*

Edited by DragonLord
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I know of two McD's that start at $7.25 or more depending on experience. Then again, most McD's are franchises and can have different start pays. They also get a raise more frequently than once every season, so by the time the season ends one could have two or more pay raises at McD's and be getting paid more than me! This is my second season and I'm only at $7.50. I could probably get a handfull of jobs that would pay 8 or more an hour and most of them would be easier than what I do now!

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PKI is so great, if I were queen I really wouldn't know what to do. I'd probably have a surprise thing on one day where everyone wearing say, a red tank top would get a free hamburger. I know it's small, but people appreciate that kind of thing. I know it's only a week that I'd be queen, but I'd still be able to do that.

I'd probably also close The Son of Beast for a day so that I could ride it. I'd have someone else running it of course, but that would be great. I would never dream of closing The Beast for a day, because half the people at the park come just to ride that.


"Don't ever try to fly unless you leave your body on the other side"

-System of a Down, "Know"

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I would make skyflyer free for a week just so I could see my "friends" who work on the ride suffer.

all merchindise would be sold at employee(maybe Merch employee) prices!

Free Coke for a week

Tie a certain PR guy up to the guess your speed game in coney next to That lone food stand and flightcommanders old line and watch the fun begin.

Put a a guy who works at skyflyer whos name begins with a E and ends with a K in a pit of spiders.

Flyers closed to public for a week long flyers show staring frequent flyers.

Beast crew would be paid double all week while tomb raider crew would take a pay cut to make up for it.

Tomb raider would be gone because of a mysterious fire I set (hey im a quee...I mean king I am law!)

Delirium would have all the seat sensors replaced(id even make sparky work all night to have it done) so that I could ride and not be smushed in like a smushed thing.

Take KC parts and Put them as decorations over Action Zone.

Drop zone. 1 longer seatbelt for myself!

FOF crew would be put on steriods to bulk up and i would have the floors replaced (StXbomber Im a king so your child labor laws mean nothing and you would help Steel coaster maintance do it!) so I could ride with no problems again.

Find the old train have it fixed up (once again all nighter if it has to be that way) and have it on the transfer tracks to scare the living hell out of the riders.

Personally remove the trims from beast for the week and do such a bad job of removing them that they could never have trims again.


(tell me where that comes from and win a prize!)

Dragonlord promoted and given a gun for the hell of it.

and finally as a king All line jumpers would be shot on site. Smokers would be set on fire. Litterers would be thrown in a compactor. Security would bruitally beat up jerks(including employees).

and Finally again! to anybody thats a PKIU fourm poster FREE ADMISSION!

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I would take the trims off of The Beast and ride it untill I passed out. I would make them actually race The Racer, hence the name Racer. Last but not Least I would make it to where you couldn't go more then 100 yards without finding a diping dots stand mmmmm.....

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Forgive me for being greedy.....but I'll share some ideas with you if I was GM for a week.

First off, I'd collect a GM's salary for a week, which would be many more times than I what I earn in a week - or month, maybe more. Hence, I'd buy diamonds for my wonderful wife who I adore.

Second, I'd purchase a small ferris wheel and try to have it delivered ASAP. As an amusement park, I think that a ferris wheel would really improve PKI - and it'd fit perfectly in Coney Mall which is the most traditional area of PKI.

Third, I'd give a season pass for life to the author of The Unofficial Guidebook to Paramount's King Island and that very lucky woman he married. Plus, I'd give him a 50% discount on all food and merchandise purchases. Why? GREED!!!! I am that author.

Fourth, I'd try to learn as much about the business as possible. I'd talk to high executives, security people, seasonal employees, park guests, etc.

Fifth, I'd get to my favorite rides early in the morning and ride them before the guests could.....then I'd go to the office for work.

Sixth, for my week of tenure........all of the Hanna-Barbera characters would grace Hanna-Barbera Land and International Street.

Seventh, I'd give raises to Marnee Guttery and Jeff Siebert because they are OUTSTANDING assets to PKI.

Eighth - I'd take a very behind the scenes tour of the park, to understand the infrastructure and appreciate the efforts of all the hard working seasonal and full-time employees. This would make me smarter and more cultured.

Nineth - I'd perform in a few of the shows at PKI. I'm a lousy singer. But in my youth (I'm 31 now) I was quite a dancer and won several talent shows.

Tenth - free admission for all my best friends (including my boss at 5/3) and their families for my week of tenure.

Eleventh - I'd sometimes cook at Bubba Gump Shrimp shack. I'd make my famous Salmon alla Pinot Noir sauce, shrimp fettucine alfredo, teriyaki salmon, and gamberi (shrimp) con risoto. They all rock!!!!!

And lastly, on my final night I'd prepare a HUGE Italian feast and share it with all members of PKIUnlimited. I have won several cooking contests and used to have my own cooking show. Free food for everyone! And free wine for folks over 21 with designated drivers.

Okay....it's all fantasy. So what. Why do we go to PKI? Fantasy - get away from the office, school, etc.

Have a great weekend,

Italian Chef

Edited by italianchef
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Wow this is hard to think about hmmm.... i think that I would probably have to lower the prices of the skyslyer and the thing with the ball that gos up and down (forget the name) and I would probably make it so the epass and a regular season pass has the same exact thing.

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I would fire all associates who walk around out of wardrobe, including, but not limited to:

Shirt untucked

Hat on backwards

Shirt only on around neck

Talking or texting on cell phone in view of GP

Eating in view of GP

I'd also work on the service with a smile aspect of things. The park could use a little more happiness. biggrin.gif . And I would ban the rain. I hate rain.

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if i were GM, i would be in heaven first of all. I would walk around the park and just talk to people and go to the stations of all of the coasters and bring the operators food and drinks for working hard. I would also probably make all pay games/rides cheaper or just make them free for a day or two, nothing big. Just make the guests and employees happier.

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Also during my week as GM of PKI I'd invite Cedar Point's best chef to PKI for a cooking contest against me alla Iron Chef style. I'd fly Kaga-san in from Japan to be MC and choose the secret theme ingredient.

In this battle of the titans, PKI vs. Cedar Point culinary battle, I'd have the most impartial judges I know: my wife, my sister, my mother, and my father.

Guess who would win the cooking contest??????

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Hey Hey Hey no need to bash Cedar Point now. Any ways SFKK is closer, so compete with them. Italian Chef do you work at PKI now?

I wasn't bashing Cedar Point. If their food was so bad - I wouldn't need my family as judges. I was just being goofy. Sorry if you took it as otherwise.

And to answer your question, I don't work for PKI. I'm still in the financial services industry.

Rates are so low!

Italian Chef

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