rexpostal Posted March 5 Posted March 5 Have you ever been to the Kings Island jail? Raise your hand! 🙋♂️ Surprisingly, I barely remember it at all!
rexpostal Posted March 5 Author Posted March 5 I don't think it was actually a jail. I think it was just the police room or whatever. They just didn't think we could safely be in the park any longer and had to stay in that room until our friends showed up. We had apparently caused a scene in line for I believe the Terror Trail or something? And we saw the lights flashing blue and red when we got out of the house. We knew it was for us. They stopped me and my friend, and asked us if we had been drinking and how much. I stated, "Only whatever we have been served here tonight! That's all!" Trying to insinuate we had been overserved by the park and we weren't to blame for our actions. Right as I said that, my friend had a fifth of E&J brandy fall out of his jacket pocket onto the ground. The funniest possible timing anything has ever happened. We had seen a specific cop earlier in the evening, and he told us we were going to end up in some sort of trouble then. He was the one that took us up to the front, and laughed about it all the way. When we got up there, they told us we need to call up our friends to get us at the entrance as we couldn't safely be in the park anymore. Both our phones were dead, so they gave us chargers, and we called them up as soon as our phones were turned on. The same officer took us back up to the front, and I asked him if I could run into a gift shop to buy a Haunt shirt. He said that was fine, our friends showed up, and he bid us farewell. One of the best Haunt nights ever, but also surprisingly, not the drunkest Haunt night I have had. 1 1
rexpostal Posted March 5 Author Posted March 5 Ahhh, the virgins have shown up. Sorry no one ever invited you to party.
beastfan11 Posted March 5 Posted March 5 46 minutes ago, rexpostal said: Ahhh, the virgins have shown up. Sorry no one ever invited you to party. My brother in Christ, I’ve out drank you in the park 10-1, I guarantee it. The difference between you and actual adults is the fact that I’m not a sloppy kid who can’t hold their liquor. 8 hours ago, rexpostal said: Right as I said that, my friend had a fifth of E&J brandy fall out of his jacket pocket onto the ground. Brandy? Are you the daughter of a wealthy plantation owner in the 1800’s? Cheers! 3 1
Losantiville Mining Co. Posted March 6 Posted March 6 (Prefacing with the fact that I don't like to drink alcohol anyways) Hey I'm sure that brandy is still enjoyable enough after nearly 200 years aging in a plantation house An embarrassing story indeed, but a funny one as well. Is this "jail" just a room in the admin building or where is it? I'm sure the park has something secure, but I don't know which of the admin buildings it would reasonably go in. 1
Browntggrr Posted March 6 Posted March 6 21 hours ago, rexpostal said: I don't think it was actually a jail. I think it was just the police room or whatever. They just didn't think we could safely be in the park any longer and had to stay in that room until our friends showed up. We had apparently caused a scene in line for I believe the Terror Trail or something? And we saw the lights flashing blue and red when we got out of the house. We knew it was for us. They stopped me and my friend, and asked us if we had been drinking and how much. I stated, "Only whatever we have been served here tonight! That's all!" Trying to insinuate we had been overserved by the park and we weren't to blame for our actions. Right as I said that, my friend had a fifth of E&J brandy fall out of his jacket pocket onto the ground. The funniest possible timing anything has ever happened. We had seen a specific cop earlier in the evening, and he told us we were going to end up in some sort of trouble then. He was the one that took us up to the front, and laughed about it all the way. When we got up there, they told us we need to call up our friends to get us at the entrance as we couldn't safely be in the park anymore. Both our phones were dead, so they gave us chargers, and we called them up as soon as our phones were turned on. The same officer took us back up to the front, and I asked him if I could run into a gift shop to buy a Haunt shirt. He said that was fine, our friends showed up, and he bid us farewell. One of the best Haunt nights ever, but also surprisingly, not the drunkest Haunt night I have had. 6 months since HH and this is the best you can come up with? Next time start with: "This one time at band camp...I got a fifth of E&J brandy stuck........." 1
Orion-XL200 Posted March 6 Posted March 6 Honestly, I laughed. The whole "jail," aspect is hilarious and I've heard of a few folks going there *cough season visitor cough cough.* If I remember correctly, it is off of guest services in a conference room. Maybe not. 3
rexpostal Posted March 6 Author Posted March 6 16 hours ago, beastfan11 said: My brother in Christ, I’ve out drank you in the park 10-1, I guarantee it. The difference between you and actual adults is the fact that I’m not a sloppy kid who can’t hold their liquor. Brandy? Are you the daughter of a wealthy plantation owner in the 1800’s? Cheers! You absolutely have not outdrank me. That is an absolute fact. 1
rexpostal Posted March 6 Author Posted March 6 3 hours ago, Orion-XL200 said: Honestly, I laughed. The whole "jail," aspect is hilarious and I've heard of a few folks going there *cough season visitor cough cough.* If I remember correctly, it is off of guest services in a conference room. Maybe not. Yep. That's pretty much what I remember. I thought I was just telling a funny story of my nonsense. I didn't recognize that it would trigger so many of these geeks. 2
rexpostal Posted March 6 Author Posted March 6 4 hours ago, Browntggrr said: 6 months since HH and this is the best you can come up with? Next time start with: "This one time at band camp...I got a fifth of E&J brandy stuck........." I have lots of stories involving my alcoholism in my younger days. This one just happens to be funny. Oh well.
TombRaiderFTW Posted March 7 Posted March 7 On 3/5/2026 at 5:14 PM, rexpostal said: Ahhh, the virgins have shown up. Sorry no one ever invited you to party. 11 hours ago, rexpostal said: I didn't recognize that it would trigger so many of these geeks. That's a bold strategy of building support and demand for future stories by condescendingly misusing the language of mental healthcare and calling us geeks and virgins, Cotton. Let's see how this one plays out. Quick detail for the room: Raise your hand if you've ever been told, unsolicited, by KI's security team that you would "end up in some sort of trouble" by the end of your visit when you otherwise weren't being disruptive. Surely with the number of people here and the high frequency with which we triggered geeks and virgins visit the park, it would've happened to someone else here...? 3 1
rexpostal Posted March 8 Author Posted March 8 20 hours ago, TombRaiderFTW said: That's a bold strategy of building support and demand for future stories by condescendingly misusing the language of mental healthcare and calling us geeks and virgins, Cotton. Let's see how this one plays out. Quick detail for the room: Raise your hand if you've ever been told, unsolicited, by KI's security team that you would "end up in some sort of trouble" by the end of your visit when you otherwise weren't being disruptive. Surely with the number of people here and the high frequency with which we triggered geeks and virgins visit the park, it would've happened to someone else here...? Yeah, I truly do not give a ****. Sorry, mate. Try someone else.
beastfan11 Posted March 8 Posted March 8 2 hours ago, rexpostal said: Yeah, I truly do not give a ****. Sorry, mate. Try someone else. So hardcore, bro. You’re the coolest guy on the theme park message board. 3 1
cdubbs727 Posted March 9 Posted March 9 On 3/7/2026 at 10:41 PM, beastfan11 said: So hardcore, bro. You’re the coolest guy on the theme park message board. Yeah, I don't think "I got so wasted at the regional amusement park's haunted house that they kicked me out" is the flex he thinks it is. 4 1
TombRaiderFTW Posted Tuesday at 01:53 AM Posted Tuesday at 01:53 AM On 3/7/2026 at 7:52 PM, rexpostal said: Yeah, I truly do not give a ****. Sorry, mate. Try someone else. You clearly do. Otherwise you wouldn't have posted the story in the first place? 1 1
rexpostal Posted Tuesday at 12:44 PM Author Posted Tuesday at 12:44 PM 19 hours ago, cdubbs727 said: Yeah, I don't think "I got so wasted at the regional amusement park's haunted house that they kicked me out" is the flex he thinks it is. It might not be a flex, but it is funny. That's the point of the story. Some stories are written to be a funny story.
rexpostal Posted Tuesday at 12:46 PM Author Posted Tuesday at 12:46 PM 10 hours ago, TombRaiderFTW said: You clearly do. Otherwise you wouldn't have posted the story in the first place? Do you think every storyteller cares about the opinions of every audience member? I've told many stories in many different forms of media, and never once did I care what anyone who read it thought about it. I wrote it for myself, for whatever reason. This particular story, I wrote to tell a humorous tale of an event that happened to me. Some people will like it. Some people will not like it. Do you make every single post concerned with what anyone else will think of it? You keep the audience in your mind the entire time you type every word?
Browntggrr Posted Tuesday at 02:06 PM Posted Tuesday at 02:06 PM 1 hour ago, rexpostal said: Do you think every storyteller cares about the opinions of every audience member? I've told many stories in many different forms of media, and never once did I care what anyone who read it thought about it. I wrote it for myself, for whatever reason. This particular story, I wrote to tell a humorous tale of an event that happened to me. Some people will like it. Some people will not like it. Do you make every single post concerned with what anyone else will think of it? You keep the audience in your mind the entire time you type every word? Not every storyteller cares but your continued rebuttals show you have some rather thin skin. It is what it is........ 6 1
TombRaiderFTW Posted Tuesday at 06:29 PM Posted Tuesday at 06:29 PM 5 hours ago, rexpostal said: Do you make every single post concerned with what anyone else will think of it? You keep the audience in your mind the entire time you type every word? Yes? Literally yes to both of those questions, lol. That's the point of stories and social media. Best of luck to you. 1 1
rexpostal Posted Wednesday at 12:24 PM Author Posted Wednesday at 12:24 PM 17 hours ago, TombRaiderFTW said: Yes? Literally yes to both of those questions, lol. That's the point of stories and social media. Best of luck to you. Bizarre, but go off, I guess. I can't imagine basing my posts around what random people think on an amusement park message board. I like to think for myself, but you do you.
TheCrypt Posted Wednesday at 07:30 PM Posted Wednesday at 07:30 PM 7 hours ago, rexpostal said: Bizarre, but go off, I guess. I can't imagine basing my posts around what random people think on an amusement park message board. I like to think for myself, but you do you. I'm begging you to just Google what rhetoric is. 1
Browntggrr Posted Thursday at 01:25 PM Posted Thursday at 01:25 PM Did anyone just Google what rhetoric is? Raise your hand! 🙋♂️ 🤣 2
LuvingKI Posted Thursday at 02:24 PM Posted Thursday at 02:24 PM 58 minutes ago, Browntggrr said: Did anyone just Google what rhetoric is? Raise your hand! 🙋♂️ 🤣 🙋 And I still don't feel intelligent enough to ever use it.
rexpostal Posted Friday at 05:59 PM Author Posted Friday at 05:59 PM Rhetoric involves using writing to influence an audience, not letting the audience dictate your writing for you.
IndyGuy4KI Posted Friday at 06:33 PM Posted Friday at 06:33 PM This thread is being closed. There is no need to go back and fourth with definitions that servers no real purpose on the forums. 2 1
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